Sitting alone in a school office at lunch time and not having any friends to invite to a birthday party, may not be the usual situation for a 10-year-old boy.
Quite possibly, it may be more common than we think, but as Valentine's Day approached, and I was thinking about an appropriate column, likely about the usual "stuff" one writes for this occasion, an article in The Huffington Post caught my attention.
But before I tell you more about Colin, I was beyond shocked, and trust me, that takes some doing, when I read in Northern Life magazine online that in the United States, in 2014, total spending was expected to reach $17.3 billion -- yes, "billion" for Valentine's Day.
I double checked and that amount comes from a survey conducted by the National Retail Federation in the United States,which claims that "the average person plans to spend $133.91 on candy, cards, gifts, dinner, and more, up slightly from $130.97 last year. Total spending is expected to reach $17.3 billion."
That's in the United States with a much larger population than Canada, but, to me at least, it's a staggering amount.
Back to Colin. The Huffington Post reported that Colin who lives in Kalamazoo, Michigan told his mother, Jennifer, that when she asked her son what he wanted to do for his birthday, he said he didn't want a party.
“Mom, who am I going to invite? I don’t have any friends,” he explained.
The Huffington Post article added that Colin was diagnosed with a disorder similar to autism about a year ago, and because of it, he has difficulty socializing.
His mother was devastated, but she took action and created a Facebook page which at the outset was set up for family and friends to send Colin birthday wishes so he could see how loved he is.
The Facebook page also demonstrates the best of the use of social media.
Here is the mother's story taken from the Facebook page:
"I am Colin's Mom, I created this page for my amazing, wonderful, challenging son... Because of Colin's disabilities, social skills are not easy for him, and he often acts out in school, and the other kids don't like him. So when I asked him if he wanted a party for his birthday, he said there wasn't a point because he has no friends. He eats lunch alone in the office everyday because no one will let him sit with them, and rather than force someone to be unhappy with his presence, he sits alone in the office. So I thought, if I could create a page where people could send him positive thoughts and encouraging words, that would be better than any birthday party. Please join me in making my very original son feel special on his day."
Colin was in for a surprise on his birthday. As I write this column, Colin's birthday Facebook page had received more than 1.8 million Likes, and growing. I spent some time going through the comments being made, and they reflect an outpouring of affection and understanding from people all over for Colin, along with suggestions like the Best Buddy Club to help him make friends.
It made my Valentine's Day. In a society which so often today seems divisive, sefish and uncaring, the support being shown to this one child because of an action taken by his mother, shows we still have the ability to focus on those things that bring us together rather than those that divide us. And without spending $17.3 billion to show our love.
Or perhaps, you may wish to undertake your own Act of Random Kindness, keeping in mind the the following quotation, attributed to Etienne de Grellet, (1773-1855), a Quaker missionary, and others. "I shall pass this way but once; any good that I can do or any kindness I can show to any human being; let me do it now. Let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again."
Happy Valentine's Day. My email is mj.morris@live.ca
Addenda... This is an update of a column I wrote in 2014 for the now defunct Cranbrook Guardian. His Facebook page is still going strong.
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